First some background though. I also think the easiest way to find out how someone wants to be treated is to ask them. This is one of my favourite models ever, Justine the Demon Hunter. She looks sexy, heroic and feminine, and is wearing full plate and a hood.
It can be done. I think if someone claims to be upset by something we should take them seriously, and find out why. Women especially. Here is a woman who is sympathetic to the hobby, gaming, fantasy and sci-fi in general, telling us that these sorts of models are not that cool. I quickly polled the gamer women in my life more than two! I see no reason to ignore them. A sexy female bard. A different bard, with a different body shape and face, but still sexy.
As Sinsynn pointed out, in our culture we tend to think of strong, heroic-looking men as sexy. That sort of portrayal has nothing to do with porn, which portrays people as nothing but a collection of sexual attributes and appetites.
By the same token, we can have female heroes who look strong, sexy and feminine without being pornographic. Look at Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Conan.
Sprinkled throughout this post are some models by Reaper Miniatures that I think achieve that. I think these sorts of models are much better for the hobby in terms of inclusion and public relations than the other kind, plus they look great.
